How to Deal With Christmas When You're Missing Someone

Most people reading this will know what it's like to have to celebrate a holiday, that's known for joy and happiness, when you're missing someone. The last thing you want to do is celebrate a holiday of happiness when all you want to do is hide in your bed.

Christmas isn't my favourite holiday. There's certain elements that I enjoy but sitting down for Christmas dinner just reminds me of the people I lost. The number of empty seats around the dinner table and wondering who's seat will be empty next.

So here's my ways that I use to try to enjoy Christmas:

Enjoy the parts that you can!

There's certain elements of Christmas that I love and I've learnt to lean into them. For example, I love to put up all the decorations and to wrap presents. Every year I go one step further with decorating the house and I even decorate my Mum's house. I love to see the look on my Mum's and son's faces when they see the house. The same for when I wrap presents.

Don't feel guilty for having fun!

Your loved one would want you to enjoy what you can and don't feel bad for doing that. They wouldn't want or expect yout to be upset and crying all day long.

Celebrate your lost loved one!

I buy a candle every year that is for my Dad and Grandad. We light it at the dinner table and just make sure that we include them. It helps me that no one forgets about them.

Take breaks and avoid triggers!

Know when it's time to walk away! There's only so much one person can take before they explode. So when the conversation changes to a topic you don't care for or the nagging becomes too much take the dog out, go for a cigarette/vape, go to the bathroom. Take a couple of minutes away from it all and come back when you're ready.

If all else fails my fall back is to get really drunk. It's not the healthiest option but it works and is a good last resort!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!